Chinese Idioms

相敬如宾

Xiāngjìngrúbīn

春秋时期，晋国有个官员看见一个农夫在田里干完活，他的妻子很恭敬地给他端上午饭。夫妻之间就像客人一样，非常客气。这位官员很受感动。他把农夫带到晋王面前，请晋王给他封官。他对晋王说：“互相尊重是一种美德。一个品德高尚的人才会待人有礼貌。我们应该鼓励臣民养成这种美德。”晋王说：“他的父亲是个罪人，我们给他封官合适吗？” 这位官员答道：“管仲曾是齐王的敌人，但齐王后来让他做了齐国的相国，帮助他完成了霸业。当年舜放逐了鲧，却重用了鲧的儿子禹。我们只要利用他的优点和长处就可以了。”晋王听从了他的话，重用了这个农夫。后来，人们用“相敬如宾”来表示夫妻之间互相尊重，以礼相待。

Chūnqiū shíqī, Jìnguó yǒuge guānyuán kànjiàn yíge nóngfū zài tiánlǐ gànwánhuó, tāde qīzǐ hěn gōngjìngde gěitā duānshàng wǔfàn. Fūqī zhījiān jiùxiàng kèrén yíyàng, fēicháng kèqi. Zhèwèi guānyuán hěnshòu gǎndòng. Tā bǎ nóngfū dàidào Jìnwáng miànqián, qǐng Jìnwáng gěitā fēngguān. Tā duì Jìnwáng shuō: “Hùxiāng zūnzhòng shì yìzhǒng měidé. Yíge pǐndé gāoshàngde rén cáihuì dàirén yǒu lǐmào. Wǒmen yīnggāi gǔlì chénmín yǎngchéng zhèzhǒng měidé.” Jìnwáng shuō: “Tāde fùqin shìge zuìrén, wǒmen gěitā fēngguān héshì ma?” Zhèwèi guānyuán dádào: “Guǎn Zhòng céng shì Qíwáng de dírén, dàn Qíwáng hòulái ràng tā zuòle Qíguó de xiàngguó, bāngzhù tā wánchéngle bàyè. Dāngnián Shùn fàngzhú le Gǔn, què zhòngyòng le Gǔnde érzi Yǔ. Wǒmen zhǐyào lìyòng tāde yōudiǎn hé chángchù jiù kěyǐle.” Jìnwáng tīngcóngle tādehuà, zhòngyòng le zhège nóngfū. Hòulái, rénmen yòng “xiāngjìngrúbīn” lái biǎoshì fūqī zhījiān hùxiāng zūnzhòng, yǐlǐxiāngdài.

A high official of the State of Jin during the Spring and Autumn Period (770-476 B.C.) once observed how a farmer’s wife respectfully offered him his lunch after he had finished his labors in the field. The husband and wife behaved as courteously to each other as they might to guests. The official found this very moving. He took the farmer to meet the King of Jin and recommended him for an official post, saying, “Respect is a virtue, and a virtuous man is always respectful. We should educate our people in this virtue.” The king, however, was unconvinced of the wisdom of this move because the farmer’s father was an ex-convict. The official then reminded him, “Guan Zhong was an enemy of the King of the State of Qi, but the king appointed him prime minister and with Guan’s help eventually achieved hegemony. And after Shun exiled Gun he promoted Gun’s son Yu to a position of trust. We should make use of a person’s advantages and strong points.” The king took the official’s advice and gave the farmer an important posting. This idiom denotes mutual respect between husband and wife.

Source: China Today